With my belly poking out from my gray sweat pants and white tank top and my Tigger slippers resting on my feet, I stretched out on my grandmother's couch and watched Finding Nemo with her. The sound to the television was louder than a sonic boom until she went into her bedroom and grabbed her digital hearing aids. We giggled through much of the movie, pausing it once to take a phone call from Stickman (from the boards) and again to head into the kitchen to warm up leftover chicken for a late supper. I didn't think I could fit more food into my already stuffed tummy. A mid-afternoon lunch found us at The Cheesecake Factory, where I devoured a California omelette (the cheese was divine) and a small salad with blue cheese, pecans, and vinagrette dressing. Of course, I had to order cheesecake. What fool ventures into a restaurant called The Cheesecake Factory and doesn't order cheesecake. Okay, so my grandmother didn't have any, but she did confiscate the entire scoop of whipped cream that came with my Craig's Crazy Carrot Cake Cheesecake (try saying that ten times fast--that's something my dad would always try to make me do with tongue twisters; on a side note...on what is already a side note...I can say Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers at an alarmingly fast rate. I'm a woman of many talents.).

Anyway, back to the point, the carrot cake cheesecake is my favorite at that restaurant, and I was craving carrot cake last night when Stickman took me for pizza at a restaurant called Barnaby's, but he had to head to work, and I decided I had had enough junk that close to bedtime. Which is why I ate some pineapple coconut ice cream when I got home. Yes, I'm a bit rotund right now. You could say that I'm definitely filling out my jeans.

There's something equally disturbing and fulfilling about being a bit thicker and holding water after a show. I feel stronger, more able to take care of myself in a dangerous situation. I feel more assertive with the extra pounds sitting on my quads, butt, and shoulders (now, if I could have delts like these to the stage, maybe I would fared better this past weekend). But at the same time, I feel a bit disgusted. My six pack is hiding beneath a layer of water. My butt looks like two moons instead of just two canteloupes (as Steve Wennerstrom so eloquently described my buttocks). My quads look like sausages about to explode. On a good note, my face is nice and full, which does help to eliminate wrinkles around the eyes. So, there's a part of me that can't wait to get back on track and begin cardio on Sunday and start with the egg whites and weighing of potato servings and cooking plain chicken, but there's a part of me that wants to taste more food. It's all about will power. I will grit my teeth come the end of the weekend, remember all the tastes that I savored this entire week, and think of how good I want to look for the shoots, which will all help me to pass up any offers of cookies, ice cream, coffee at Starbuck's, lunch at Bennigans, and any other delectable treats.

I'm going to treat the off season differently this year. I'll begin it seriously the first week of September, but I'm going to begin a plan of attack for next year as soon as I get home to Dallas this weekend. I've decided that I may be sitting out this show in August, but it will be because I have a major surprise in store for everyone. Just wait and see. When I step on stage next year, your jaws will drop. You've seen me make improvements in just eight weeks, twelve weeks, six months. Imagine what one year will do!

On that note, I'm off to pop another piece of chocolate in my mouth. Will power begins in 48 hours. Not a second sooner!

Jodi :)